Perhaps you have heard the statistics regarding the escalating situations of abuse towards children since the beginning of this season of social isolation. You may be wondering, ‘Is this is an issue in families in my church or my community? ‘Is there anything our church, our ministry team, our school, our sports organization can do? Can we protect children; what is the church’s response to kids in crisis?
YES.
You may be surprised that the answer to all of these questions is a resounding, YES. You are equipped and able to be a support in helping protect children during Covid-19, right where you are, with the resources you already have on hand. And if you lead a team, you have a small army of people who can be equipped to help your church respond to kids in crisis.
First, let’s try to understand the increasing problem at hand.
“In many ways, the disease is now reaching children and families far beyond those it directly infects,” said Cornelius Williams, UNICEF Chief of Child Protection
Families are under stress and financial pressures. In some instances, this can lead to short fuses from their parents or caregivers, an increase in arguments, rage, hateful words (verbal and emotional abuse), rage and physical abuse. Routines for kids have been disrupted and they are struggling to process the changes and the accompanying emotions. The increase in stressors, both for parents and for children can lead to an increase in abusive situations.
In some households, in your community and within your church, added family stress increases the risk of violence and threats to the safety and wellbeing of children. Child protective services are working with a more limited schedule and with schools closed, teachers are not able to function as eyes and ears to observe any red flags. More and more cases of child abuse will go undetected.
In a recent article, Dr. Jayme Coffman shared that within a five-day period in March, she saw seven children and infants who had been severely abused and required hospitalization. Typically, the hospital she works at in Texas, sees fewer than ten cases of fatal child abuse in a year. That week alone, two children died from their injuries. While it is too early to directly link this spike, Dr. Coffman expressed concern over the apparent trend.
Kids can’t come to church right now, but we can BE the church at a time when they need us more than ever.
How does the church be a voice for the most innocent, most confused and potentially greatest at risk for injuries from this season of Covid-19 that are not directly from the virus itself?
Protect Children – The Church’s Response to Kids in Crisis
1. Ask to Get Answers.
Text out a link to a short 5 question survey that families in your church can easily complete from their phone. Consider asking them to rate the current season for their family. (Financial stress, emotional stress, parenting stress, etc). Even go as far to ask if they have their bills and tangible needs taken care of. Ask specific questions in order to get specific answers.
*The information you gather here can help to identify needs within your community. (This is a great option for schools and other community organizations or teams to utilize to get a grasp of the pulse of your sphere of influence and impact.)
2. Resource Families.
Yes, the online content churches are providing in this season, is AMAZING. Kids are being engaged and learning about Jesus. Keep it UP!
That is not the only value churches can bring to families, however.
Utilizing the platform you have, whether via website, social media, email, group texting, or even all of the above to push out resources is invaluable to families in this season.
Who can a parent call if they find themselves in a domestic violence situation? What resources are available if they feel at risk of a violent outburst against their child? If they are feeling overwhelmed about getting food on the table, where can they go in your local community to get tangible resources?
Do you know what organizations are available in your city? Now is a great time to make a list with direct links and keep it updated. It takes courage to speak up and ask for help, make a list support resources easy to find and readily available in case families are not ready to ask outwardly for support.
Churches that are pro-active instead of re-active, will be ready to be a support as soon as it is necessary.
3. Challenge Isolation.
Now, I do not mean break any of the rules or boundaries put in place by your community leaders. What I do mean, is release your leaders. Don’t let families navigate this season alone. Below are some ideas of what that can look like…
- Model for your small group leaders how to love and support families by the way you love and support them. Take care of your team and empower them to take care of the kids they invest in.
- Implement a system where EVERY child in your network is checked on by someone on your team. For ages 5 and up, get your leaders to facetime with the child directly (with parent permission). Figure out how your team can connect with kids. Laying eyes on a child or a home situation can often alert an adult to situations of concern. (All red flags or situations of concern have to be reported following the guidelines outlined in your area. Ensure your team is equipped and comfortable in the event this is necessary.)
4. Call the Skeletons Out of the Closet.
Brainstorm a list of families who have a child that navigated behavioral challenges (or even academic challenges since school is taking place at home now) in your ministry. They likely navigate those same challenges at home. Typically, challenging seasons or seasons of transition or change will escalate those behaviors. Have an experienced leader CALL those parents. Ask open-ended questions.
- How is (child’s name) handling the changes?
- Change is difficult for so many kids and can escalate behaviors, how is (child’s name) coping?
- Do you find that you are emotionally strained or at the end of your rope?
- What can I do to support your family? (Be ready to offer suggestions when they say ‘oh nothing, we are good.’ (Sitting on a video chat with a child for 30 minutes, every other day, to read a book or play a game, & give a break to a stressed-out parent could help.)
- Create a list of strategies to support & encourage parents – post it on your website, send it in email form and equip your team to use it to provide strategies for stressed out parents.
Download one list below with some helpful strategies to share with parents & caregivers. (Great to print in 4×6 card size.)
5. Reach beyond your walls. (mandatory anyway since we are not gathering in buildings right now!)
While your local schools and guidance departments are not able to share private information, they may be able to help connect you to families that could benefit from support. Guidance counselors and school administrators are already hyper-sensitive to particular student cases that may be at risk.
What a unique opportunity to reach out and be the church. Explain the ways your team can connect and partner with students and families. Be honest about your heart and motivation.
With parent permission, guidance counselors may be able to connect you with families who could benefit from a partnership with you.
You may not be able to protect all the kids in the world, but protecting one child changes their world.
We all have a responsibility to protect children and the church’s response to kids in crisis can be a model for the surrounding communities. Children who have been sent home to high-risk situations, do not have to be left without a voice.
Additionally, below are some links and phone numbers that can help resource your team at a national level. (Also make sure to include your state, city and county resources as well.)
Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline – 1-800-4 A CHILD
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 1-800-273-TALK
Crisis Text Line – text HOME to 741741
Girls & Boys Town National Teen Help Hotline – 310-855-4673 or text TEEN to 839863
You can also check out my post on ‘Handling Difficult Things – Kids, Quarantine and Emotional Rollercoasters‘. It includes some additional ideas and resources on ways to support families dealing with stress and anxiety.
Please share this post with ministry leaders, school leaders or even coaches who could use some of this information to help connect with kids. We can be eyes and a voice for the most vulnerable in our communities.
“And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these, my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me.’ Matthew 25:40 NLT