According to a recent study by Barna Research Group, 58% of highly engaged parents choose a church based on its programming for kids.
What makes families choose to stay at your church? Apparently, kids programming plays a big part in the decision.
We may not have control over WHAT families chose to prioritize when hunting for a church to call home, BUT we do get control HOW we respond to it. I would argue that our response has to be to evaluate and determine where we can or need to make changes.
For a church planted in a high family demographic area, family ministry needs to be part of your targeted church growth plan. In fact, if your attendance is not growing year over year, (or month over month), or you want to see an increase in the rate of growth; investing in your children’s ministry may just be the way to go!
First, kids’ ministry attendance numbers are hopefully being evaluated weekly as part of your overall weekend attendance numbers. For churches in areas populated with families:
A solid bottom line goal would be to have kids’ attendance consistently at 20% of your overall weekend attendance total.
Personally, my goal has always been to see around 28%-30% of weekend attendance being comprised of kids. Overall attendance numbers are not the only numbers to evaluate, however.
Two more questions to ask as you address the health and target the growth of your kids’ ministry are:
- 1)How many first-time guests are visiting each week?
- 2)What percent of our first-time guests return for a follow-up visit within the first 4 weeks of their initial visit? (With average attendance being close to one time a month for many families, especially initially, tracking this over a 4-week period is important.)
For additional information on evaluating the health of your team, see this post: Success Gauges.
As the leader of a ministry team, you should be engaging in a consistent cycle of evaluation.
I am unashamedly all about the numbers. The numbers are the only way we can determine if our team is healthy and how successful we are being at accomplishing our vision and mission.
Every number has a name, every name has a story and every story matters to God. If it matters to God, it should matter to us!
5 Questions every leader should evaluate regularly for their family ministry team:
- What is working?
- What is not working?
- Is there anything we can do better?
- Where can we push the envelope to be MORE fun, MORE engaging, MORE effective?
- How can we better take care of our team that is helping us to push the envelope?
What are parents looking for?
If want families to choose to stay at our church instead of the church up the road, it is important to understand WHAT is the criteria parents are looking for?
Below are the three main criteria I have observed parents use when choosing a church for their family:
1) Is it SAFE?
This is always the number one question parents want answered. Be certain they are coming to conclusions about the safety of their children as soon as they step on to your campus. Look at every detail that a mom or dad will observe through the lens of ‘if I was a first-time guest and I saw ‘this’ would it communicate safety to me, or cause me to feel concern?
Parents are concerned over physical, mental, emotional and spiritual safety. Preschool parents are going to place heavy emphasis on physical safety in regard to environments, teacher-to-child ratios, toileting and other policies that are in place, etc. Elementary parents, while they are still concerned over physical safety, will start to shift heavily towards the other side of safety. Leave no stone unturned when evaluating your ministry for safety.
An unsafe preschool ministry will hinder church growth.
A fun, engaging elementary ministry will propel church growth.
2)Is it fun and engaging? Do my kids WANT to be there?
Elementary aged kids can get their parents to church.
Obviously, they do not drive their parents to church, but have you watched the systematic way an elementary aged child can break down their parents trying to get what they want?
Kids are experts at relentlessly and passionately pursuing what they want. Basically, all children come with this ‘gift’ pre-programmed inside them. Just spend some time in the toy section of target and you will see exactly what I mean.
In my experience, most parents do not want to deal with the weight of the guilt that is left over telling their child ‘no, we just can’t go to church, we have to sleep in today.’ If their child is begging them to go, you have a pretty good chance, they are going to get up and go.
Does your kids’ ministry leave kids begging their parents to come back?
Parents, especially parents who are highly engaged in church already, place a heavy value on being a part of a church that creates an impression on their kids that they just – can’t – miss being there. When families choose a church, you can bet, there will be a strong consideration given to whether or not their kids WANT to be at that church.
3)Will you partner with our family in developing a spiritual foundation for our kids?
One particular story jumps out at me when I think about partnering with families. I remember, one particular Sunday, we had a family show up AFTER our services had concluded. (Our goal, like yours, is for families to actually ‘attend’ our programming not show up afterwards. I was perplexed.)
Mom shared with me that they had been away on a weekend vacation at the beach. While they were away their daughter had mentioned some things that she had learned at church and told them asked them if she could have a personal relationship with Jesus.
Would you believe, that mom and dad packed up everything and flew back into town to make it to church before we left? They were excited, emotional and unsure of how to lead the conversation with their daughter because they wanted to get it right. Faith conversations are a big deal and can leave parents feeling overwhelmed.
Parents don’t want us to do it for them, they want us to help equip and empower them.
These parents didn’t need me to lead the conversation, but, they did need someone to link arms with them and help them feel equipped and empowered to lead the conversation. Supporting those parents and getting a front row seat as they helped lead their child into a relationship with Christ is still, to-this-day, one of my favorite ministry moments.
A children’s ministry that consistently teaches biblical truths, in age-appropriate ways, is planting seeds. At the right time, those seeds will grow and develop into a solid foundation. Parents are looking for a church that will plant seeds towards a solid spiritual foundation as well as a place they can count on to link arms and be a support to them in their roles as mom and dad. It takes a village to raise kids. Parents want a church that is an active part of their village.
What a privilege and an honor to have families choose to allow your church to partner with their family.
In conclusion, continue to figure out new ways to create safe, engaging environments to develop kids’ spiritual foundations and you will see more kids and more families choose your church to call home.
Before you leave, go ahead and read more about the results of the Barna Research group study I referenced in this post, HERE.